Time for Reflection

I find that the more time I take for self-care the better I feel. I know this is an obvious comment, but I find that self-care often gets put the on back burner...one of those things that "I'll get to when I have time." That is ironic in itself. Take time each day to do the things you enjoy such as meditating, reading, exercising or just sitting quietly. I find that I feel much better when I have taken time for me!

Summer and Relaxation

Taking care of yourself is the best thing that you can do for you and your child! When you are in better spirits, you have more energy, you feel better and you have motivation to play! Remember, taking time to play with your child each day is important to their development. In the busy adult lives we have, we often forget to stop and play with the little ones who count on us most. Your child will grow up before your eyes and the laundry, cleaning and bills will still be there, but your child will be long grown. Let the chores sit for a little bit and take the time to enjoy the simplicity of playing!

Child Abuse Prevention Month

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month! As parents, educators, counselors...adults...we need to make sure our most innocent people are protected. Teach your child about abuse. Educate them on good touch (hugs, handshakes), bad touch (punching, hitting, kicking), and secret touch (sexual, touch that is to kept a secret). Give the the words they need to have a voice!

Infant Trauma

For many years doctors believed that infants did not remember pain they endured. As we have become more educated, we now know that infants actually remember pain and trauma through body memories. Some people still struggle with this concept, but I live it everyday. My youngest son was born premature. He spent weeks in NICU where he endured numerous needle pricks, IV intrusions, feeding tubes, and monitors. When I brought him home I remember feeling that he still wasn't quite "right." He was a tight baby; one that did not snuggle in when you held him. He cried uncontrollably anytime I took his temperature, wiped his nose, or touched his chest. His cry was not "typical." It was terrorizing; like I was hurting him. His eyes would glaze over and he would freeze in a panic mode. This is no way that a mother wants to remember her child's infancy. As time progressed, he aged, but developmentally he did not. He required swaddling at 18 months of age. He craved sucking into his toddler years, and he remained easily agitated when he was touched on his nose, chest and arms. He never slept. He continued to wake every two hours on his feeding schedule that he came home from the NICU on. I honored his story of the NICU, which he told me through his desire to remain in infancy until it was resolved. I spoke kindly to him, letting him know that he was safe and that he needed to stay in the NICU to survive. I did sensory work with his body, used weighted vests and allowed him to wear hats to bed because it calmed him. I took him to craniosacral therapy with a great physical therapist took time to hear his story as well as mine. She sensed the trauma and heard the anger of a lost birth and attachment. Through a rebirth process he (and mother) were allowed to do it again. Amzaingly his body became loose, he calmed and was able to self-soothe, he slept through the night and he became age-appropriate overnight. It was the most amzaing and beautiful experience! Never question your child no matter the age. Listen and honor their story. Don't discount early trauma because it can sometimes be the answsers to all the questions.

The Magical Times

This time of year is a magical time for children. They are full of wishes and dreams and imganiation. There is nothing more precious than a child's joy. I realized this on two occasions this holiday season thus far. The first is when a commerical for a toy comes on tv. My 3 year-old gets wide eyes and big smile and says "I want that whole thing" to me. He dreams and thinks about Christmas morning everyday! The other is when my 4 year-old saw the Santa Claus set-up in the mall and she asked "Is this town?" When I answered yes, she stated "Good; because Santa Claus is coming to town!" Take the time to enjoy the simplicity of a child. Their life is wonderful, magical, colorful and the most beautiful place on Earth!

Play while you Parent

As a parent we are exhausted at the end of the day. We get up two hours earlier than we need to in order to get ourselves ready, get all the kids ready, deliver them to their appropriate locations, and then get to work on time. When we return home from a busy work day the last thing that we want to do is get on the floor and play with our kids. When kids don't get enough time to connect with their parents throughout the day they may become cranky, withdrawn or easily agitated. So why not play while you parent. Your child could be throwing the biggest, loudest temper tantrum, and instead of yelling or engaging in the the behavior make it a game. That's right. Tell your child to scream louder, cry harder, or stomp faster. The result might be surprising. Your child will most likely begin to laugh and giggle instead of cry and scream. Give it a try. It may not work for all kids, but what do you have to lose?

Back to School

The time has come for school to begin again. Take time to check-in with your child each day after school, and don't accept the answer "nothing happened at school today." Inquire about who your child played with at recess, who they ate lunch with and what activities they engaged in throughout the day. Be sure to ask your child regularly if they have any problems with bullies. Often times children hide when they are bullied and bullying can be a cause in slipping grades, increased stomachaches and headaches, lack of focus, and fear of school. Take time to be connected with your child, and check-in regularly with school officials if needed.